Have you ever taken a road trip? If yes, you know what is a detour. You also know how much fun it is. You also know that detour gives you an experience that a straight drive on a highway cannot. You might just end up at a scenic lake or a hillock, you might just land up in an unknown village and experience some hospitality, you might just find some time to drive in the ease with zero pollution and traffic around. Yes, you do lose on some time and some fuel in doing this. You will be facing some anxiety also. But guess what, that is what makes the detours so interesting. You may forget the nuances of the journey but nobody forgets the details of the detour.
Life too has detours
Life is much like a road trip and let us accept detours are a part of a road trip. So what is a detour? Simple, a detour is a longer, less direct way to get where you’re going. It is understood for majority of us to go to school, get brilliant marks and secure a seat at the best university, get out with a flamboyant degree, grab that job at a fancy MNC, get the most eligible bachelor as your life partner and voila, you did it!! However, for most of the people around you will notice that some of these magic puzzle pieces are missing. Some don’t get those degrees, some don’t get those jobs, and some don’t have the desired life partner and so on.
And there is where we start feeling behind in life. We see our friends and colleagues have a better version of anything and everything we have. These lead to feeling empty, hopeless at times even desperate. This hollowness might make way for jealousy too. The only thought that plays on mind is: “I should be ahead of where I am”. This needs to be addressed.
Only 2 things you need to do to eliminate this
Yes, you read that right. Just two things that you need to do. But, these two things are not one-time actions; they are supposed to be done every single day. It has to be a conscious choice. Back to basics – consistency. If not, you can be getting back into the same old gunk.
a) Love your detour: Do you know the other word for the detour is the scenic tour. Yes, it is about the beauty of detour which you need to adore.
Detours might consume extra time and fuel as discussed earlier, but you have to trust the timing, the timing of life. Getting their sooner is not always the only right option. While planning, while making the choices you most definitely made the sane choices, yet you are where you are. Accept it. Frankly, there is no other way to deal. The situation you are in, is the only fact of the moment, like it or not. This experience is just teaching you something that you need to learn at this point. Accept and adore your detours and they will be easier, if not easy.
b) Avoid comparison: Go cold over comparison. Easier said than done,
but fundamentals remain the same. It is like doing those non-stop shots and experiencing the hangover the next morning. May be worse than that. Here is exactly all the unwanted stuff of, I should be ahead, I should be more, I should be better comes from. Comparison is the mother to these culprits. If you don’t do those comparison shots, there is no way that offensive offsprings can enter into your life. Comparison is not just the thief of joy; it is also burglar to happiness. It will take all of your self-esteem and leave you to do the ugly cry. How do you stop? Simple; put your blinders. Constantly looking here and there is just slowing you down. Be in your lane and focus on yourself. Consider social media detox.
This will take discipline and vigilance. And when you do this it will make you feel better about yourself, you will suddenly have more time and energy for your dreams. Understand and remember this, get a brain tattoo: “Where you are is exactly where you need to be, trust the timing of your life. “
Detours can be individualistic or can be something that affects all of us, like a pandemic that we are going through. Use these two simple tips and see how it helps, whether it is the corona detour or an individualistic detour. Do share your inputs, suggestions or questions at firstname.lastname@example.org